Hey It’s Okay: Jordan Hulse
Image: Danielle Painting
Happy Women’s History Month! This month, and every month, we’re celebrating women and change makers who are leading with consciousness, creativity and compassion. As we channel kinder thoughts and ease into the year, we’re celebrating Life Coach Jordan Hulse, Founder of Hey It’s Okay - a community led by a mission to help to make people feel less alone.
Hi Jordan! Thanks for slowing down with us. We’d love to hear more about your journey to creating Hey It’s Okay…
Thank you so much for inviting me! Like most self-development and coaching communities Hey It’s Okay was born out of my own struggles.
I had worked in the advertising industry for around 3 years and just felt totally alienated. I came from a fashion background and felt that both the people (although lovely) and the work I was doing was very different to what I was used to and where I wanted to be. When the pandemic hit I just felt grateful to have a job, and so stuck it out, but in doing so totally lost myself.
I found myself a coach, and started to work on finding myself again and loved my experience with her. Around a year later I had a total breakdown at work one day, and was signed off work with stress and depression. Over the time I was off, I found my way back to myself and remembered the great experience I’d had with my coach and decided I wanted to help others so that hopefully no one felt alone in their experiences- and Hey It’s Okay was born!
During the pandemic, we collectively had an opportunity to slow down and reflect on our relationships and habits. As the world felt increasingly shut down and physically disconnected, how did loneliness come into being a big part of what you normalise?
There was a loneliness problem way before the pandemic- but the pandemic catapulted loneliness to the next level! I think we have started to normalise not socialising, living digitally and staying in more to save money. But there is this obsession with showing up as perfect 24/7 especially online which has been normalised so much that it feels like anything less than isn’t worthy. I think that can be the most isolating thing! If you’re about to start a business but all you can see online is people sharing all the money they’ve made without the late nights and sacrifices, or somebody pregnant and only seeing the best bits about motherhood and making it look a walk in the park… I think sometimes our honesty could set ourselves and others free and be more welcoming and inclusive, which is what I am trying to achieve with Hey It’s Okay.
Hey It’s Okay is a growing community - at the moment, who have you found is drawn to you and your work, and at what stages of life are they?
Love this question- loneliness affects all of us at some point in our lives but I have mostly found that it is people going through big life changes. People wanting to date again, those wanting a career change or wanting to start a business. I love being there for people as they take these big leaps- so they have someone to support them, cheer them on and make them feel less alone.
Image: Danielle Painting
Your relationships are something that you often value and celebrate - what qualities do you find make a great, lasting friendship? What are those green flags?
The relationships in my life are something that I am so so grateful for; I genuinely hit the friendship lottery. I’d say green flags in my relationships are thoughtfulness: me and my girls will get each other ‘new job’, ‘congratulations’ etc cards for things that happen in each others lives. Another one would be effort: relationships are two way things and there’s nothing worse than feeling like you’re making all the effort and getting nothing in return. And the last one would be laughter!! Friendships (and all relationships actually). It’s so important that you can laugh together and have fun.
We all experience waves of loneliness - what tips and mantras have you found helpful to ease its intensity?
Yes absolutely. A lot of the work I do with my clients involves truly getting to know themselves and making a bit of a toolkit so that they can build a list of things to reach for when they’re feeling low.
A good starting point are small and simple things that you enjoy such as: a warm bath, your favourite meal, getting outside in nature, a hot drink. If we do something that we know we love when we’re feeling rubbish - no, it won’t make those difficult feelings disappear completely but it will incrementally make us feel better and also help us start to build trust with ourselves, as we are demonstrating that we can care for ourselves.
Love these tips! Before we let you go, we love to share recommendations to our readers. What are you:
Listening to?
I cannot stop listening to Cleo Sol at the moment especially her song ‘Sunshine’, - it puts me in such a good mood.
Reading?
I rarely get to read just for fun, when I’m reading it’s usually to learn so on holiday recently I bought a book called ‘Just For Fun’, by Jane Fallon and I loved it!
Watching?
Sex Life! I binged Season 2 on Netflix…
